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A Tale they wont Believe...jawaproThu 17/05/2007 10:00 AM
This is a very long post. It´s my entry for the www.itsnotcheating.com.au competition. What do you think?
Let me tell you a story….
A long time ago, there was a kingdom called the Microsoft Kingdom. And the king was a wise man called William Gates.
King William was a hero of the war against the evil Lord Macintosh and his legion of evil minions. They had once threatened to over-throw the entire world – but King William had managed to rally his forces, and hold back the forces of evil.
So Lord Macintosh was defeated – and retreated to the east to rebuild his forces – and King William was able to rule in peace for many years.
But every year – King William’s Knights of the Treasury would come and tell him that there were serious problems in the kingdom.
You see – the king didn’t charge taxes. He got his money by selling software programs to the inhabitants of the land. You might thing that strange – as they didn’t have computers back then – but that doesn’t change the facts.
But there were two groups of people that didn’t buy any more software – and these were a concern to the king and his Knights.
The first group was lead by a man called Linux Hood. He believed that he could make software that was as good as or better than the Kings – and offered it for free.
He had a collection of very dedicated followers – who believed that they were the way of the future.
The King couldn’t stop this behaviour – as some of the software the Hoods were producing was very good, and rivalled his own in some areas, and even surpassed it in others.
And there was nothing illegal about what they were doing either.
The other group was a bunch of rebels that weren’t anywhere as honourable as the Hoods. These guys just stole and copied the King’s software for themselves.
They called themselves the Wolf-men.
So the king gathered his forces – and went to war against the Wolf-men.
But the Wolf-men were scattered, and very hard to find.
The King was able to battle a few – but for every one that fell – another five appeared somewhere else.
Most of the time, the Wolf-men couldn’t put up a decent fight – and the King was able to defeat them easily.
But sometimes – they were stronger than expected – and the King had to beat a hasty retreat with his remaining forces.
And all the time – the Hoods were attempting to convince the Wolf-men to join them. And they were often successful. Some of the Wolf-men decided that if the Hoods offered their software for free – they didn’t need to steal it from the King.
But there was even more troubling events to come. The evil Lord Macintosh’s trusted general – Ivor Podrick (shortened to I Pod) had been conquering lands in the east – and the King could tell that the evil Lord Machintosh would be preparing another attack. And he couldn’t leave the fate of the world in his evil hands.
But in order to mount a suitable defence – he needed soldiers to rebuild his army. And some of the best soldiers were in the Hood and Wolf-men armies.
But although he tried, he was never able to convince them to join him.
He needed a new plan. Something that’d get them on his side.
So he sought the counsel of his wisest knights. And they suggested he try a drastic new strategy.
You see – the King had a piece of software called Office. It lets people write stories and stuff (indeed, this story was first written using Office before being turned into a website).
Now office did have competitors in the Hood’s arsenal, but they were never as good, and Office always came up trumps.
If they could get the Wolf-men and Hoods to buy Office – then they could call on them to join them in the coming war against the Macintosh hordes.
Or that was the plan – at any rate.
But the problem – Office is very expensive.
And the Hoods said it wasn’t worth it – when they have a some-what okayish alternative.
And the Wolf-men, well they already used it – but only the versions they stole. So they didn’t feel any reason to join King William in his war.
But then one of Knights of the Treasure had an idea.
They could sell Office cheap.
And I mean REALLY cheap.
That way – the Hoods would be tempted – and at least some of them would buy it – and thus join in the defence effort.
And even some of the Wolf-men who scorn at the idea of buying software would be willing to buy it if it was cheap enough. According to their way of thinking, if nothing else – it’d mean they didn’t have to dread the day the King would find them.
So the king went to propose his idea to the Hoods and Wolf-men.
Will it work?
I dunno.
Because the story is only beginning.
But check out www.itsnotcheating.com.au where you can buy MS Office 2007 Ultimate for $75 if you have an Australian Uni email address.
Ultimate edition includes Access and a heap of other stuff you don’t normally get. And normally it costs over $1000, so it’s a huge saving.
So will you join the King and his men – or would you rather be a Hood or Wolf-man?
The choice is yours….
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A Quick QuestionjawaproWed 16/05/2007 10:00 AM
Regarding my new website - I want your opinion about something.
When you look at comments - would you prefer they were in newest-first, or oldest-first order?
Currently this website uses newest-first, and I think it sucks. I´d rather read them in order. I think I´d changed this website to do things that way before I screwed it up and lost all my updates.
But which way do you prefer?
Cheers for the help.
JP
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Interesting...jawaproTue 01/05/2007 10:00 AM
I just got this in an email from Steelman. Give it a whirl...
----
Take 60 seconds to do this, I guarantee you will show someone else,
1. go to www.google.co.uk
2. click on "maps," above the search bar...
3. click on "get directions"
4. type "New York" in the first box (the "from" box)
5. type "Paris" in the second box (the "to" box)
6. click on "get directions"
7. scroll down to step #23
"Going to war without France is like going hunting without your accordion."
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SorryjawaproMon 30/04/2007 10:00 AM
For anyone who regularly comes to this website (and there are a few) I appologize for screwing things up a week or so ago.
I uploaded some files to the wrong website when I was working on my new one - and it screwed this site up, and then when I fixed it, I uploaded some old files from a backup to restore this site.
But the backup was older than I thought - and now a lot of things are broken (things that I have already fixed once).
- Some links dont work
- comments are displayed backwards
- I no longer get emails when someone posts
- there is no add comment box when viewing comments
- there is missing content in the Uni pages
- the Google ads dont fit their container
- and who knows what else.
It´d take a bit of work to fix it all - so I´m not going to bother. My new website is fairly close to being useable - so in a month or so it should be going (sorry for the slow progress speed - work takes first call).
And in the mean time - sorry for the poor state of my website.
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Far out!jawaproSun 29/04/2007 10:00 AM
I didnt check my email over the weekend - but when I checked it this morning - I had 24 new accounts sign up at my forums.
And none of them were legit.
Far out - I can´t wait until I finish the new website - it should be able to stop at least most of these annoying registrations.
- JP
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