Oscar up the Gog

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Funny Emails


  • 50. You watch the entire trilogy at least once a month.
  • 49. You don't need a TV and VCR to watch the movies.
  • 48. You draw comparisons to Star Wars in casual conversation.
  • 47. You think John Williams is the greatest composer who ever lived.
  • 46. You wonder why the SW theme never makes it into any of those "Classical Collections"
  • 45. You know all the words to the Ewok song.
  • 44. Everytime someone tells you one of their deepest seccrets you gloat and say, "You're far too trusting."
  • 43. You insist on telling people the odds about everything.
  • 42. Someone mentions being abducted by little green men and you respond by pointing out the Yoda would never do such a thing.
  • 41. You find yourself discussing characters from the books and movies as if they were actually old friends of yours.
  • 40. You have a pet named after one of the characters.
  • 39. You have a child named after one of the characters.
  • 38. You truly believe you are strong in the Force.
  • 37. You dream about Star Wars, both at night and during the day.
  • 36. You've told people that you are fluent in six million forms of communication.
  • 35. When you and a friend have been on one of those amusement park rides where you had to sit back to back, and you start calling him Dack and tell him to stop whining about his approach vector.
  • 34. When you mother asks you to babysit your little brother, you reply, "Leave him to me. I will deal with him myself."
  • 33. When you walk outside with your friends, you walk single file to hide your numbers.
  • 32. You pay 10 bucks for a magazine that describes the planet of Tatooine.
  • 31. Whenever you buy a new appliance, you always make sure to get one that speaks Bocce.
  • 30. When your professor hands you back a paper and says, "Commas are your weakness," you retort, "and your faith in your friends is yours."
  • 29. People tell you to stop saying, "I have a bad feeling about this."
  • 28. You think the babblings of Yoda are relevent and useful to everyday life.
  • 27. You don't need subtitles when an alien speaks.
  • 26. Yoda and Ben appear to you in your dreams and you take their advice on a regular basis.
  • 25. You've kept the good Kenner action figures separate from the bad ones.
  • 24. You've written several letters to the President recommending that he dissolve the council, put the power in the hands of the regional governers, and let fear keep the local systems in line. (president@whitehouse.gov)
  • 23. After several hours of poker, you got thrown out of the game for suggesting "How about a game of sabacc?"
  • 22. You've ever used fishing line to try the snowspeeder-tow cables maneuver on your cat.
  • 21. The girl you've been going out with suddenly tells you she loves you and you reply, "I know."
  • 20. On Halloween, you would never dress as one of the following:
    • Luke
    • Han Solo
    • Leia
    • Vader
    • Chewie
    • Threepio
    • Artoo
    However, you would dress as:
    • Wedge!
    • Porkins
    • Crix Madine
    • that spider droid from Jabba's palace
    • that fat dancer from Jabba's palace
    • Sy Snootles
    • Imperial Death Star firing officers (dorky hat patrol)
    • Mos Eisley Cantina bartender
    • The sewer monster
    • Boba Fett!
  • 19. When someone next to you gets a good grade on a test you say to them, "Impresive, most impresive. Obi-wan has taught you well."
  • 18. When riding your bike, you look behind you and accelerate wildly by pressing down on the pedal with your right toe.
  • 17. You have physically threatened threatened anyone who referred to "Hans Solo" or "Dark Vader", confused Star Wars with Star Trek, or spelled Wookiee with only one "e".
  • 16. Everytime you put a glove on your right hand you say..."that's right, Artoo We're going to the Dagobah System. I have a promise to keep to an old friend."
  • 15. When someone apoligized to you, you choked him and told him that you accepted his apology.
  • 14. When driving your car, you've popped the trunk and said, "R2, that stabalizer's broken loose again. See if you can't lock it down."
  • 13. When nobody else is around you've tried to draw it something into your hand with the "force."
  • 12. You've composed lyrics to the SW theme.
  • 11. You've called somebody "laserbrain"


  • 10. You've held up an onion ring and said, "Lood sir, droids."
  • 9. You've pretended the orange in your lunchbox was a thermal detonator, and thought about using it to get a better price for milk.
  • 8. When your looking through your drawer for that other black sock, you aid your search by telling youself, "Lock on to the strongest power source, it should be the power generator."
  • 7. You've used one of Solo's lines in an intimate situation.
  • 6. When you've been pulled over by a policeman and when asked to see your drivers license you replied, "You don't need to see my identification."
  • 5. Any time you pick up a walkie-talkie or two-way radio, the first thing you say is "TK-421, why aren't you at your post?"
  • 4. When you go into a electronics or hardware store, you actually look around for power converters.
  • 3. When trying unsuccessfully to snare that last Cheerio floating in your cereal bowl, you remark, "the Force is strong with this one."
  • 2. When your alarm clock goes off in the morning, you reply, "Unexpected this is... and unfortunate."
  • 1. As a child, whenever you had broken something, your response was always, "It must've had a self-destruct mechanism. I didn't hit it that hard."

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