Oscar up the Gog

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Poetry




The Evil Thing



I’m the evilest thing ever invented,
Though some think I’m the best.
I interrupt people all the time,
In fact, I’m a downright pest.

I might get you kicked out of class if I yell,
But most people take me with them anyhow.
At the cinema I’ll make people hate you,
Throw things, and call you a cow.

Driving along, you can talk to your car
And you can talk to your mate,
But you can’t talk to me
Or you’ll get caught ‘n’ run late.

Sometimes I’ll shout and surprise you,
Other time’s I’ll just grumble till you notice me.
I’m your most constant companion,
But talking to me ain’t free.

I am truly evil, I admit to the fact, but
You probably couldn’t live without me.
I know this to be true, just leave
Me behind one day and you’ll see.

You’ll miss me all day,
Wondering what I might have said,
Possibilities of good and bad news
Going round and round in your head.

I’m a fantastic friend sometimes,
I could even save your life.
But more often I’ll just remind you
To pick up some bread for your wife.

I’m the most evil thing ever invented.






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